And if it isn't obvious yet, a very soft spot in my heart for music :)
Yesterday, my husband encouraged me to go out, have some me time and get my hair cut (I had been complaining about my hair all week). While I was out, I started thinking about the various ways women torment themselves to look good. I had plenty of time to think because my salon was closed, and so was my backup. However, I was not going back home until someone cut the quasi mullet thing that had established itself out of the cute layered cut it once was. A girl can only go with the ponytail for so long before it begins to look sloppy.
As I sat in the new salon, describing what I wanted, I told the woman I wanted low fuss. Now, years ago, low fuss to me meant brush it while wet and go. Now it means hair product to match my mood (Do I want curly or straight?) and hair accessories to go with it. If I am going all out I drag out the hair dryer or the straightener. Then if I add in hair color, hilights, lowlights, and malibus it starts to get a bit more complex. The salon lady asked me when the last time I had color was and was more than happy to point out my damaged hair. I know my hair has roots I have been growing all summer and my grays are popping back out all over the place. I simply can't keep up sometimes!
But hair is only a small portion of the rituals of women.
I have given up shaving. That sounds a lot more hippy than it actually is, since I replaced it with waxing. Eyebrows, legs, bikini line, pits. Have you ever waxed your armpits? The first time in indescribable. There really is nothing to compare it to except the feeling of skin and hair being ripped off one of the more sensitive parts of your body. The good news is that each successive time there is less hair and they come out a bit more easily. I haven't shaved in well over a month. No more shaving bumps and itchy regrowth. Just a little bit of masochism for the purpose of looking good.
On to skin care. I thought when I grew up, acne would be a thing of the past. It's a teenage problem right? I am nearly 30 years old, and I can't keep my face clear for more than a week for anything. It's the most fun around my time of the month...as if bleeding, cramping, bloating, and raging were not enough. Sure. Throw in a few big zits just for the hell of it!
So I have oil free face wash, oil free face scrub, toner, cold cream, moisturizer, eye cream and night cream. Then to cover up the acne that always shows up anyway (and probably contributing to more) I have concealer and foundation and pressed powder. Add in eyeliner, eye shadow, mascara, and lipgloss and my favorite, the eye torture devise or eyelash curler just to add to the "pretty" factor.
I added in the eye cream and the night cream when the effects of aging began to take their toll. I woke up in the morning and about pissed myself when I saw this pale creature with black circles and dry wrinkled skin lumbering in my bathroom....wait a minute. Hey >:(
So I add the eye cream to get rid of the black circles. It's not like I can fix it through sleep (which is a whole other post). I start developing little white bumps under my eyes. Milia. Go ahead and look it up. I had to. Great. Black circles or tiny little cysts? Hmmmm.
Then there is the night cream. I bought the oil of old lady....errrr....Oil of Olay because the moisurizer works well for me. There was a dramatic difference in the morning. I didn't look quite so haggard. Of course, my acne count about tripled. I just can't win this skin care business. Hand over the paper bag ma.
I am not prepared to get into clothing (and the nightmare that is bra shopping) or shoes (how can something so cute be so painful?) in this post. I am not even going to get into manicures and pedicures and dry elbow skin oh my. And diets? That is a whole weeks worth of posts on their own. It amazes me what we women actually put up with in order to look good.
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